Making networking and presentations less painful for introverts

Networking plays a vital role in the professional world, opening doors to new opportunities and collaborations. But for introverts, nothing is more daunting than standing in the spotlight.
Jenny Toh, founder of River Life Coaching and a self-identified introvert, shares her top tips.  
Here’s an excerpt of the conversation:
Gerald Tan:
Instead of thinking about (networking) as a big group of people, (in a) big room of strangers, maybe we need to tune to look at people (as) individuals. Individuals whom we feel like we can connect with and we might want to befriend or want to engage. 
So it’s not like you have to talk to every single person in the room; you’re going in with an aim. We’re looking for some people whom you can connect with and get it done. I think that helps a lot to not make it seem like a chore. And I resonate a lot with what Jenny says about the inauthentic part. It’s very fake. I’m trying to be somebody I’m not. So then perhaps, it’s really just to be yourself and looking for people who can connect with the kind of person that you are.
 Tiffany Ang:
What if being yourself is just wanting to be alone? Let’s say in a business networking setting, you are sent out for a seminar, or you’re sent out for a networking session. So how can an introvert better prepare themselves for an event like this? And then when they are there, what can they do? 
Jenny Toh:
I like what you said about introverts preparing themselves. So that’s what we do, because we introspect a lot for such social events we need to prepare (for). I’ve coached a lot of clients on this topic, so it’s not so much being visible in the workplace, but maybe your manager asked you to go for a convention.
You’re one of the representatives of the company, and you feel that, “Oh, I don’t want to do this. It’s going to be three hours. There’s so many people; I feel very tired.”
So, you be specific. You say, “I’m going there. Okay, within my control. I aim to talk to three people, and these three people are from industries, A, B, C, so I can gather more diverse feedback.”
Remember the manager said, “Go, attend this conference, represent the company,” so meet with three people.
And with these three people, my aim is to understand something about them professionally, apart from what’s stated in the delegate list, and maybe make a little personal connection, nothing too personal, but just something a common ground, right? And then you give yourself that time, three hours to do it, and once you’ve hit three people, anything above that is a win. It’s the human nature, right? 
Tiffany: 
I thought you were going to say, “Exit the room! Exit the room!”
Jenny:
But I realised that when I coached my client, and she set a limit, a target of five. Once she hit five, she felt energised, because it’s a motivation, like I achieved my goal, I can do more. So, anything on top of that is a bonus, right? 
But I agree with you, have an exit strategy. If you feel that you’ve gone with another colleague and another colleague wants to stay on, have an understanding to say, “I’ll leave after two hours. Okay, you can carry on, but I’ll leave after two hours” and give yourself the permission to go. 
Back then, when I didn’t understand introversion, like I shared, I pushed myself to stay for dinner, to go out for drinks, I didn’t give myself permission to be myself, right? And that’s what made me feel very inauthentic.
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